7.1.20

What the last ten years have taught me

lessons ive learnt from the past ten years
ten things ive learnt in the past ten years what the last ten years have taught me about life, lessons ive learnt from the past ten years

Into the unknoooooown

Kids back at school/nursery (with a few tears at drop off for Mabli, ah so hard!) but hopefully getting back into routines.. new year, fresh starts you know how it goes.
Although I've yet to really feel like I've got my head into that mindset yet. It feels much like the fog that engulfed Bristol a couple of days after Christmas. So beautiful and eery and great for taking pics ;)

It's WILD to think its a new decade and that it's such a space-age number like 2020, what! The past ten years have been full of so many big moments that any other decade will find hard to top. We ticked off some of the big ones, house, kids, marriage as well as less conventional things like quitting our jobs and working from home together. I've been blogging since 2010 so this marks ten years over on this space. I think if I can get it together enough I might do a little round-up of the things I've recorded over here.


That's not to say the last ten years have been a breeze. There are have been many losses, a baby, my mum's health and a family estrangement.

Life isn't always so clear or easy and it's sometimes hard to see where your path will take you or even if you are on the right one at the moment. There is a huge amount of pressure to have set goals or to be starting a new year inspired to do this or that and a new decade feels like even more pressure. It's ok to not know where it will take you, or to feel like you even know what you would like that to look like.

It's mad to think that by the end of this decade Wilf will likely be leaving home and Mabli will be fully emerged in being a teenager. I honestly have NO idea what my life will look like with grown-up kids, it's certainly an unknown that I'm apprehensive about. I know that amongst the hard times in the early years with little children things can feel relentless but I also know that these will and have been the best so far in my life. I'm scared to lose that and I'm scared of not appreciating it enough as I'm in it.

ten things ive learnt in the past ten years
what the last ten years have taught me about life

Until then I'll be singing Frozen songs with both my kids as much as possible thank you very much


Some of the most important things I have learned in the last ten years would probably be, don't be scared of trying a failing. Some of you might remember the online homeware and accessories shop I set up and ran for four years. Let me tell you it barely broke even through those years (in fact I'm pretty sure it ran into a loss there at the end). It was SO much work for little return but it was my dream to be a retailer for so long that I'm glad I tried it despite it failing.
That being said I'm glad I saw when to stop. I'm glad I realised that other avenues worked better and focussed and worked hard at those without the worry that those too would fail.

Don't get burnt out, everything will suffer. Take breaks, make time to read books even if you have no time. Your home will almost certainly always be messy if you have kids, don't sweat it too much.

Make sure you are the most generous person in the room. Kindness is always the most important thing. My mum once told me when I feeling particularly jealous and sad and angry (shortly after my miscarriage about anyone with a healthy baby or pregnancy) she said 'collect kindness points' every time you feel like doing or thinking the exact opposite, think of it as reaching a goal and reward yourself with each kindness point you collect'.

Clean out toxic people, you don't owe them anything but you owe yourself not to be hurt by them.

Don't compare yourself to others (this one is SO hard and I fail at it often)

Learn how to forgive yourself, I have said stupid things or acted in certain ways that when I think on it can lead to a spiral of thought that it was all-consuming and destructive. Forgiving myself is as important as to try and to fail.

Meet friends, make time for dates, make sure you leave the house once a day even if it's just the school run or a trip to the shops.

Take lots of photos!

Thanks for reading and to everyone that has been reading for a decade!! 

1 comment:

When 2 become 5 said...

I love the kindness points! What a lovely idea.

It’s scary to think just how different our lives as parents will be in 10 years, my son will be 22! I almost can’t believe that.

Wonderful reflective post x

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