Trigger Warning, this is a post about going through miscarriage at 10 weeks. I thought long and hard about whether to post this on here or not.
Miscarriage at 10 weeks
In a couple of weeks I was hoping to publish a completely different kind of post, I even had it all written up, along with the letters I had written every week. I don’t know what to do with those letters now..
I realised something was wrong about a week ago, my mum and I went to have a check up but the scan showed there was nothing wrong, a strong healthy heartbeat, and a cute little picture to take away with me and show Tom.
I guess I feel a little angry about that now, a week later and the same little room confirms I have lost my baby. I am going to let myself cry for as long and as much as I feel I need to. It is very much a part of me now and although I know it is a fairly common occurrence it doesn’t make it any easier.
One thing I have realised however is how much I am loved. I don’t know what I would do without my family and friends and even though Tom’s heart is breaking too he has done nothing but look after me and try and make it easier.
I decided to post about my miscarriage at 10 weeks as l found it really helped when I read other people’s stories on the Internet. It’s maybe not right but hearing other people going through the same pain does make you feel less alone. Less to blame.
Though such a short part this is now part of my story and I am going to take a bit of a break to let it soak in and to grieve.
The heartbreak of miscarriage, especially at 10 weeks when your hopes are high, and dreams are multiplying, it’s a silent type of sorrow. I want anyone reading this and going through the same thing to know I get it. It’s like the world should pause, but it relentlessly spins on. You’re allowed to grieve, to cry for the ‘what could have been.’ Every tiny life, even scarcely begun, leaves an imprint, an invisible etching on your heart. Be gentle with yourself.
For support on miscarriage then I recommend checking out the site Tommy’s Charity
4 Responses
I'm so sorry for your loss, I don't know you but I was so upset to read your post. I know its so hard for you now and nothing anyone will say will make it any better but time is a great healer.
I know someone close to me who lost babies and she was heartbreaken for a long time but she went on to have two kids and not a day goes by tho that she doesnt think of the babies she lost, she is always wondering. But it has made her such a strong person now although these things don't make any sense.
My thoughts and prayers are with you, xx
I don't remember how I stumbled upon your blog but I pop in occasionally and am always lifted by your joy for life and pretty things. I am so sorry that you are going through such a painful experience. Life chucks these crap things at us and I just know that you will get through this, wiser and stronger. Lots of love xxx
I'm so sorry Fritha. That's very sad news indeed. I hope you manage to keep strong and keep hope.
Am glad you have such caring and lovely people around you at this time. Friends and family are such good medicine x
Dear Fritha. I'm so sorry for your and your partner's loss. My husband and I went through the same thing a couple of years ago, and it's the most horrible thing I've ever had to endure. It gets easier to cope with, but it is painful and horrible and I am so sad for you. If you ever need to chat, you know where I am. I hope 2011 is full of hope and joy for you, Ax